We all want to be happy, but mental health experts say there are common behaviors that stand in the way of a joyful life.
• Shame, guilt and worry. According to HuffPost, these are the most common disruptors of happiness. Practicing self-compassion is the best way to assuage these feelings, says Tamika Lewis, a licensed clinical social worker and founder of WOC Therapy. She adds that expressing gratitude is another way to dispel them.
• Not pursuing paths or activities that make you happy. Staying in a miserable relationship or job will naturally stand in the way of your happiness. Not taking appropriate action to change things that make us miserable so we can follow a more positive path will paralyze dreams of a happier life.
• Judging yourself or comparing yourself to others. Comparative thinking robs us of our happiness, says Julie Holmes, of Life Coach New York City. Social media sets us up for comparison so limit your time on Facebook and Instagram. Remember what you are seeing on social media isn’t necessarily the whole picture.
• Trying to please others instead of yourself. Pleasing people is another barrier to true happiness, says Holmes. Don’t compromise your deepest wants or needs in this life for anyone. Doing so will only cause resentment and regret.
• Constantly saying “should” statements. This is another type of comparative thinking that inhibits happiness. By repeating things like ‘I should be better off in my career’ or ‘I should feel more fulfilled,’ you’re leaving the present moment. ‘If you can, try and focus on really being present where you are, taking a look around you, what’s right in front of you and trying to appreciate what you can from it,’ advises Stephanie Dahlberg, a social worker from Nashua, New Hampshire.
• Ignoring deeper problems. Burying past traumas will certainly place a roadblock on the path to happiness. Unpack deep-seated issues through therapy, if necessary, so you can heal and move forward to a happier place in life.
• Isolation. Humans are inherently social creatures. When we isolate ourselves, we miss out on essential social interactions that provide support, comfort, and a sense of belonging. Isolation can lead to feelings of loneliness, which are closely linked to depression and anxiety. Moreover, being alone often deprives us of opportunities for sharing experiences, learning from others, and receiving emotional validation, all of which contribute to overall well-being and happiness. Building and maintaining meaningful connections with friends, family, and community is crucial for a fulfilling and joyful life.