Former Child Star Details 'Creepy' and 'Exhausting' Relationship With Older Man

Former child star Jennette McCurdy revealed she was involved in a "creepy" and "exhausting" relationship as a teenager with a man in his 30s, saying the age gap created an unhealthy power dynamic.

The former "iCarly" and "Sam & Cat" actor discussed the relationship during an appearance on the "Call Her Daddy" podcast, ahead of the Jan. 20 release of her debut novel, "Half His Age."

Jennette McCurdy, now 33, said the relationship began when she was around 18 and working at the time. The man, whom she did not name, was in his 30s.

"I was most likely 18," she said, recalling how the relationship developed.

She said the man attempted to shape her tastes and interests, often introducing her to films and music he liked.

"He would show me movies that he thought I would like. Like, 'Dazed and Confused,' which I did not like but I pretended to like. He would play me music that I did not like, but I pretended to like."

The actor said the relationship was further complicated by the fact that the man was already in a long-term relationship and living with another woman when they became involved.

The period also coincided with a time shortly before the death of Jennette McCurdy's mother, Debra McCurdy, who died in 2013.

"It was just exhausting," she said.

She recalled an incident in which the man came to her apartment intoxicated shortly after she moved out of her mother's home.

"I remember he came over drunk one night to my apartment. At this point I've moved out of my mom's, I'm very new — also red flags all over."

After the man ended his long-term relationship, she said she was caring for her mother following a hospital stay. She said the man insisted on staying with her despite her concerns about her mother discovering the relationship.

"I can't have my dying mother and my boyfriend that she doesn't know about and would never approve of staying at my apartment at the same time," she said.

She recalled feeling pressured to accommodate him.

"We have a dilemma on our hands. He uses the 'You can't meet my needs' thing a lot. I go, 'OK, I'll get us a hotel room.'"

She said she booked a hotel near Universal Studios, describing her mindset at the time as naive. "That was like my idea of a good hotel," she said. "I was like, hopeful, like 'Maybe we can go on the Hogwarts ride!'"

Jennette McCurdy also said the man pressured her into sexual activity at a time when she lacked basic knowledge about sex.

She said the man frequently praised her maturity and intelligence, reinforcing the imbalance in the relationship. He told her she was "mature" and said, "I can't talk to anyone this way; I can't believe how smart you are."

Looking back, Jennette McCurdy said the experience left her feeling "powerless" and "embarrassed." She said she ended the relationship after her mother's death and described her former partner as a "f***ing loser."

Reflecting on the age gap from her current perspective, Jennette McCurdy said, "Can you imagine now being with like a [teenager]? Creepy."

The relationship appears to have inspired her upcoming debut novel. "Half His Age," is a work of fiction that centers on a teenage girl involved in a relationship with an older authority figure.

The novel follows a 17-year-old navigating an affair with her teacher and examines issues of power, vulnerability, and control.

The book is published by Ballantine, an imprint of Penguin Random House.

In a statement released to USA Today by the publisher, Jennette McCurdy described the writing process as deeply personal and creatively significant.

"Writing 'Half His Age' has been the most creatively fulfilling experience of my life," she said. "Through a 17-year-old girl named Waldo I got to explore the complexities of desire, consumerism, class, loneliness, the internet, rage, addiction, and the (oftentimes misguided) lengths we'll go to in order to get what we want.

"Waldo's story is ultimately about finding yourself in a world designed to make you lose yourself, and that felt profoundly meaningful for me to write. I can't wait for people to read this novel."